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Can first time sex hurt women?

Posted: 15 May 2013 10:09 AM PDT


The first time you have sex, it's not all smooth sailing. In fact, many fears are attached to it. Dr Mahinder Watsa tells you what to expect (and what not to expect) the first time you get intimate with someone.

There'll be many a slip
Everybody wants their first time to be perfect. Some even envision it to be some kind of fairytale moment. Nothing wrong with that, but one should know that there could be slip-ups, all the same. The man often wishes intercourse to last longer, but if he achieves orgasm early (presumably due to a rush of excitement), it is okay! Some may even fail to achieve an erection and in that moment of disappointment, label themselves as not being 'up to the mark'. If that is what you think, it is a big mistake. You can always end the session with ample foreplay. If things don't go as planned in the very first time, there's always a second time. If a man can achieve an erection during masturbation, he is normal. So just relax and go with the flow.

Yes, it hurts, but wait
For women, the first time can be a little painful, but hang on. It's not the pain that they must dread. In most cases, the pain is almost like that of finger prick. However, it's the fear of pain that makes things worse. The hype surrounding the pain often induces fear in women, resulting in spasms at the slightest touch. This is where it is important for the partner to step in. Firstly, ensure she feels comfortable with you. Ample foreplay is a must to get the vagina lubricated. Start with inserting a finger to rupture the hymen, and then slowly, proceed towards intercourse. The key is to take it slow.

Bleeding? Maybe. maybe not
That a woman must bleed during her first intercourse is undoubtedly the most misguided notion people harbour. The bleeding occurs when the hymen splits. However, why is it so difficult to understand that the same hymen which is considered a mark of virginity by many men can also split due to other reasons? Rigorous exercises such as cycling can split the hymen. In some cases, it may even be congenitally absent. The hymen can also rupture, when women masturbate. Bleeding, or no bleeding, the fact that you are close enough to your partner to get sexually intimate demands you also put a certain level of trust in her. Doubts, if any, should be cleared right in the beginning, and not in the bed.

Contraception can fail
One wrong move is enough to invite unwanted pregnancy. Don't rely on withdrawal method or the safe days of the woman's menstrual cycle. Unmarried couples must use condoms. If marriage is around the corner, the woman can visit her gynaecologist a month before the wedding. The doctor will put her on oral contraceptives, safe enough to see the couple through the honeymoon phase. Later, the couple can consult the gynaecologist and select the contraceptive method that suits them the best.

It will get messy
When body fluids are exchanged, it can get quite messy. But there are no two ways about it. Either you do it, or you don't. So don't fret too much about unwanted stains and keep an extra sheet handy.

I was loved and hated for being upfront: Sunny Deol

Posted: 15 May 2013 09:37 AM PDT

Sunny Deol is a busy man, what with the sequel of 'Yamla Pagla Deewana' inching close to release. We caught up with the actor-filmmaker in between meetings at his office in Sunny Villa. The otherwise reticent Sunny appeared to be in a candid mood and didn't hesitate to answer our questions. Excerpts from the interview:

The way you function has changed over the years.

(Smiles) Today, it's important to promote your film; it's now part of the filmmaking process.

What about your temperament?

Back then, I used to get irritated with filmmakers and crib about the things we didn't get right. I was both loved and hated for being upfront. But I was just being myself. Today, when I watch my movies online, I feel they are looking nice in totality. At that time though, I never felt so. However, I still get angry even today (laughs).

Why has there been no connect between you and actors who came after you like Aamir Khan, Akshay Kumar, Salman Khan and Shah Rukh Khan?

I am happy with my family and my colleagues and want to continue making my own kind of cinema. I have never belonged to any camp and have no friends in the industry. Most of them will pay lip service but when it comes to doing, they tend to shy away.

Reportedly, there was trouble during the making of Darr but now, YRF has bought the audio rights of your film. Looks like times are changing

(Serious) Things change over a period of time. At that moment, you tend to be brash. From my point of view, I was right. On their part, they may have been right. Whatever the case, I don't want to dig into the past now. We have all moved ahead. As things stand, they are doing my music and I am hoping they will do a good job.

But things had soured between YRF and you for quite some time.

As old people say, things get better with time, time heals all wound. I am the kind of person who has always done what he wanted to. If they had wanted to work with me, they could have approached me that's not the issue here. At one time, late Yash-ji too wanted to do two to three films but somehow, I am not the kind to do too many things at the same time. I like to take it slow and steady.

But why are you suddenly making a sequel now? Is it because it has become the trend?

No. While I always thought of making sequels to movies like Ghayal, the filmmakers would almost always veto the idea. I used to watch a lot of Hollywood movies and loved the way certain characters kept coming up in further installments of the franchise. However, things are changing for the better now.

Do you want to stick to your image?

No, I don't want clapping... I want a good script.. the action image was all about a man who doesn't give in and stands by his family and friends. It's now more about a normal man and what he wants...

What about Ghayal 2?

I will change the definition of action with that sequel. One should feel the pain when the hero falls and I am going to achieve that. Ghayal 2 is not about the 'dhai kilo ka haath'. It's about inner strength.

Salman Khan to launch Suniel Shetty's daughter

Posted: 15 May 2013 09:36 AM PDT

Aditya Panscholi's son Sooraj will make his debut with Suniel Shetty's daughter in the remake of Subhash Ghai's Hero

In the never-ending turf war between kids from film families and rank outsiders, there are fresh reinforcements for the former every day. Joining the ranks of Alia Bhatts and Arjun Kapoors of the industry are two new faces Sooraj-Aditya Panscholi and Athiya-Suniel Shetty.

The two kids will make their debut in the official remake of Jackie Shroff's 1983 blockbuster, Hero. Director Subhash Ghai has sold the remake rights to Salman Khan and the development marks an end to the speculation over 18-year-old Athiya's launch vehicle.

While it is not clear who will direct the project, TOI has learnt that Ghai, who has an ear for music, has been requested to score for the film. If that works out, it will be a milestone in the filmmaker's long and eventful career.

According to a source close to the developments, "Salman has requested Subhashji to help with the music. He has always been a fan of his musical hits Karz, Karma and Khalnayak." As for the kids, Athiya was in New York last year where she studied filmmaking and liberal arts at the New York Film Academy. Reportedly, she was even one of the hot contenders for Sajid Nadiadwala's Heropanti, starring Jackie Shroff's son Tiger.

Sooraj has been training in dance and martial arts. He assisted Sanjay Leela Bhansali in Hrithik-Aishwarya starrer Guzaarish and Kabir Khan in Salman-Katrina starrer Ek Tha Tiger. According to reports, that is where he caught Salman's attention.

The film is likely to go on floors by the end of this year. Subhash Ghai remained unavailable for comment.

Next Wave 2012
Mahesh Bhatt's daughter Alia Bhatt
FILM: Student of the Year

David Dhawan's son Varun Dhawan
FILM: Student of the Year

Boney Kapoor's son Arjun Kapoor
FILM: Ishaqzaade

2013-14

Shakti Kapoor's son Siddhanth Kapoor
FILM: Shootout at Wadala

Salma Agha's daughter Sasheh Agha
FILM: Aurangzeb

Sunny Deol's son Karan Deol
FILM: Untitled (Sunny Deol)

Jackie Shroff's son Tiger Shroff
FILM: Heropanti

Rati Agnihotri's son Tanuj Virvani
FILM: Luv U Soniyo

Aditya Panscholi's son Sooraj Panscholi
FILM: Tu Mera Hero Hai

Suniel Shetty's daughter Athiya Shetty
FILM: Tu Mera Hero Hai
Posted by Sheik Azmol Haque Jony

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